Since I do so love Jeff Foxworthy, and his "You might be a redneck if..." commentary, I decided to start a list of my own. Without further ado, "You might be a reptile person if..."
...You go digging through the recyclables to save plastic water bottle lids, toilet paper tubes, and egg crates.
...You go to bed sweating because it's become more efficient to heat the entire house than individual tanks.
...To you, Tupperware means 'sauna', not 'leftovers'.
...You wonder why anyone would buy the glass starter tanks, because clearly they aren't stack-able.
...You get irritated at a ten minute drive to the grocery store for food, but a four hour trip to the next expo seems perfectly reasonable.
...You can understand why someone would breed roaches.
...You've ever had to move the rats to get to your ice cream.
...When someone says, "Nice rack!", you look for a caging system.
...Similarly, "That guy has awesome balls," does not sound like an obscene reference to you.
...When the news reports a python on the loose, anything under 8' makes you shrug dismissively.
...You know why people hate shipping from California.
...You've ever looked at your collection and thought, "Hm, guess I'm not moving to Hawaii."
...The animals in your home have three different categories: Pets, Breeders, and Feeders.
...You actually have a species wishlist.
...You know the difference between UVA and UVB, and what the purpose of vitamin D3 is.
...And you actually care.
...The term, "Sperm Retention" means something to you.
...You see your friends will all of their cute, cuddly, furry, affectionate animals and don't really see the attraction.
...You catch yourself correcting people on the difference between a turtle and a tortoise.
...You've ever rolled your eyes about amphibians being lumped into the same category as tortoises, snakes, and lizards.
....You can explain to the person sitting next to you why they wouldn't be.
...You know that male snakes don't have a penis.
...You thought to yourself after that last one, "Great, now we're going to have yet another thing to clear up with all of the non-reptile people...."
